Giving it up to Jesus is how I look at this day. I would like to think that I am really strong in this area but I have thought on it quite a bit today (hence the late blog) and I realize that I am really strong for periods of time, if that makes sense.
I am going to use my ex-husband as an example (sorry Bill). Mostly, I am so over the hurt and pain of our divorce. I am married to the most wonderful man ever and God made he and I for each other. We are soul mates. Bill and I get along good these days and can even laugh and joke and plan things such as birthdays together. But in those small moments of time, when he makes me mad over something he says or he gets the kids upset, I am often (but not always) pulled back into those memories of hurt and anger immediately. I am not longer angry over the present but over the whole of our relationship. Some will say, this is, "being a girl", which I will admit, we are wired that way generally. But some of it is our flesh just not being what it should be. Just like I am not the person I was 5 years ago, neither is Bill. And while I do not want him to compare me to 'that Shelly' I am sure he does at times.
So today, my goal is to get all that hurt and pain under the blood of Jesus so when he does something to make me mad (and I assure you, he will at some point), then it will be about that day and that incident only and not something that happened in 1992 when we were young, stupid newlyweds whose idea of communication was to throw things and scream (me) or to just ignore and not talk (him).
Blessings and prayers for getting rid of bitterness and strife and unforgiveness in our daily relationships.
Shelly
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