Thursday, February 10, 2011

One of the hardest blogs. . . ever




Logan, It is so hard to find the words today, my emotions run really deep these past few months. It could be my babies are growing up and doing things like driving and graduating highschool or it could be old age. Glancing over to the couch, there is a young man sleeping there, not a little boy. Today, on your 16th birthday, there is no school because of snow, and who knows what time you went to bed. All I know is that now you takes up 1/2 the couch and just yesterday you took up a cushion. Well, maybe a few yesterdays ago, but it all goes by so fast.
Where did this two year old boy go with a heart of gold and a laugh that would melt your very being? You became a fiesty five year old who refused to wear anything but sweat pants and or eat anything but cheetos and reece cups. The five year old who was in so love with his teacher, Ms. Oliver and would make this face anytime you were asked to smile for a picture.

Then there was this eleven year old guy, who walked me mom down the aisle, even though you still didn't really like Brad too much yet. Glad that's changed, makes my life easier. I'm thankful that we have that memory of you, wearing your tuxedo reluctantly, looking like quite the handsome young man. And I am thankful for these memories, of when you starting being yourself with Brad and seeing how much you really are alike and how much you love each other.


Now here you are, a lanky 16 year old, who sends me around the world and back to find jeans that actually fit you. You are finally taller than me and Cait, which makes you VERY VERY happy! It is crazy how fast this last year has past. Logan, you have grown above and beyond all I could image. You have grown in the Lord and you have started to really seek His will for your life, and it shows. Sometimes it may not seem like I see it, sometimes it may feel like all I do is fuss at you and make you do things you don't want to do, but I see it. I see the potential in you and I see the spark in your eyes so I push you to be more, to do more, than you think you can.

I know the move to Nashville has not always been easy, but you have embraced new adventures, new friends, new places and taken it all in stride.

You don't realize the impact you have on those you meet, but you are influential among your peers, you will make such an impact for God in this city.

When I see you curled up next to Bailey and Hunter in the evening, everything is right in the world. When I see you at church with your hands raised in worship, I see your heart for Jesus, and it is Big. When I hear you in your room, playing your guitar and singing, I wonder how on earth the time has past so quickly, but it does. Tomorrow you will be one step closer to 17, then 18 and then graduation and I know I have so much more to prepare you for in such a short time.

It is an amazing honor to be your mom. It is an amazing, crazy, fun, sometimes challenging and frustrating journey to watch you grow into adulthood. Keep your smile through all life brings your, keep you faith in every situation, keep loving people when they don't love you back, make people smile when they feel like they can't anymore, play your music and sing what's in your heart. Those are your gifts, use them. I love you and hope that this year brings you more clarity and focus then every before.

Mom