June14, 2009

We were talking this weekend about when we first came to Point of Mercy, our church home here in Nashville. Today I got on my blog because I remembered writing a post the next day after we had visited, the day that changed our life and put us on the path we are walking today. This post was about the pain and the betrayal and hurt we were feeling on that day. It is AMAZING how far God can bring you in a year's time.

Almost one year exactly to that day, June 17, 2010 ~ we moved into our cute, roomy bungalow here in East Nashville. We moved here where Hopkinsville already seems to be a life time ago.

Here where there are sidewalks to take the puppies, music lessons the next block over for Logan, and our kids going to high school on a college campus. Here where God has placed us to do a work for Him.I am amazed and in awe at how great our God is and that He chose TeamDeason to walk through the fires we have went through so that we can help others to come out on the other side, just like we have ~ I never want to forget the blessing in the trial because on the other side the sweetness of knowing it was all for us to grow in Him makes each trial worth it ~ We are Blessed Beyond Measure

Shelly

Seventeen Again ~ A Letter to My Daughter

Caitlin,

Seventeen means so many things to me. Seventeen has woven itself in and out of my life since the day I was born; and today, as you turn seventeen, it happens once more.

Your grandmother was Seventeen when she found herself pregnant with me and seventeen when she married your granddad and had me that August of 1973.

Seventeen years later, in 1990 on a warm August Saturday, your Dad and I got married and at seventeen, I was a wife. I cannot imagine how my mom felt letting me marry at such a young age, and I am thankful that you have your sights set on Jesus, schooling and career at this age instead of marriage. On that warm August afternoon in 1990 there were no doubts and no fears, only excitement for the future. I am sure that your dad and I could have made better choices and while there were things we both regret; you were were never one of those regrets. Three years later, on May 5th, 1993, you arrived; you were more than we had hoped for and we loved you with all we had in the best way we knew how.

Last night, like every birthday in between, we came together as a family for a birthday party that you really didn’t even want to have. We ate and laughed , had birthday cupcakes, virgin margaritas in pretty glasses and had our house full of love. It warmed my heart when afterward you told me that you were glad I had the party for you. This party, was admittedly, for me. I feel that this is the last chance to catch you in that divide between child and adult, and I wanted to revel in every second of it. If I had it to again, I would go back and even buy a piñata.

When you were a baby, I pushed you to be independent, I pushed you to be your own person and on days like today, I wish I had let you be a baby more, let you lean on me more and ride on my shoulders instead of walking on your own. Today as you are on the cusp of becoming a woman, I have been observing how you are taking charge of your life and I am proud to be your mama. I am proud of the drive you have to go after a career that will be challenging and heartbreaking on some days, I am proud that you are learning much earlier in life than I did that your words have weight and meaning, I am proud that you love Jesus more than anything else in this world and that you have a heart for the hurting around you.

Where did this crazy-faced, cake eating baby girl go who was so happy to just have a Cinderella party? Gone is this little pigtailed girl and in her place is a young woman on the brink of first loves, first heartbreaks, first kisses, first car, first college experiences. Thank you for bringing me along on this trip with you. It's amazing to be your Mom. Digging through the photos of your life tonight, I cried as I saw those moments and faces that only come in certain stages of life. I am thankful that not only do you respect me as your mom, that you love me as a friend.


Don’t ever take the stages of your life for granted. It's okay to be single, it's okay to be in love, it's okay to be whatever you want. I am grateful for every fork in the road and every decision I have made because it brought me to today. Don’t ever worry about what others think of you, plow ahead into all that life has for you; and on the sidelines, I will be here, forever cheering you on as only a mama can. I hope some of these photos bring back the good memories for you that they brought me tonight.

I love you Cait, keep Jesus and your family first and be like me in this one respect, Make every Seventeen Count!

Mom

The Door

I came to the realization today that, in my heart, I am already a Nashvillian. As I sit in my house in Kentucky, with my yard dry enough that it could be mown today, I cried every time I looked at pictures from Franklin, Hermitage, East Nashville, Downtown, Hendersonville, etc. THIS is my city, this is the place I love and now, it has a lot of work before it to get it back to where it was before. The door of my heart is so open to Nashville, more so now than ever before I wish that I was there standing arm and arm with the sandbaggers and sump pump operators. Being able to tell people that we have extra room so come on over would at least feel like we are doing something.

My heart breaks as I think of children who don't have their favorite blanket or pillow and for moms and dads who have no idea what they will do because they have no flood insurance. Being an animal lover, I think of the many animals that are displaced. Being a small business owner, I think of people that if they lose their business, their whole world is turned upside down.

My heart hurts for the homeless person who's home is literally washed away. I think of how the two income family is not much different from the people who always reside underneath the Jefferson Street Bridge or have a tent or two off of Trinity Lane. Every Sunday and Wednesday, as we head down Trinity Lane to church, we will see a few homeless people, sometimes panhandling, sometimes walking their dog, sometimes just heading to the tents that you can see through the brush on the right hand side of the road right before the Pilot. The white & blue tarps are just visible enough for you to know they are there, and I wonder, as the brush becomes green with spring and summer, will we even see that? When we see these folks we always talk about it, how we are so blessed to not be without, how we are blessed for family that helped us when we could have been in that place, those tents on the side of the road.

As you watch this video below just put yourself there for a minute, for a moment in time and think of what you would do if this happened to you. This was swift and unimaginable and honestly, it will probably get worse for most people before it gets better. My heart breaks and my words move often today for God to show His face in this disaster, for Him to make himself known. Maybe He makes himself known in us, maybe it takes things like this for us to tap into the relationship with Him that we need.





Please continue to pray for Nashville families and businesses and homeless and churches that unity will bring us all together and that God will be glorified through this tragedy somehow. If you can help financially, please send to the red cross.

We have checked a few times and as far as we know, this door (and the house attached to it) is safe. This door makes my heart smile and gives me hope. It makes me aware that I will be there hand in hand with my neighbors through the summer and beyond, restoring a city to its beauty and wonder.





It's the door that will welcome us home when we get to Nashville in June. It's the door that many will go through for bible studies, cookouts, sleepovers, fellowship, yummy cup cakes and love. I am excited to share more behind this door with you but that will keep for another day. Just keep our friends and neighbors in your hearts and your minds and Keep Him First Always.

Blessings,

Shelly

Loss

Sometimes I get tired of how I blog. I get an idea stuck in my head and it won't go away until i put it here, for you all to read. This week has seemed to be surrounded by loss both in the positive and the negative. Loss seems to be all around me & since I cannot escape it, I will blog about it.Honestly, I feel like shouting right now about the goodness of God in my life. I am sure that would scare some of you to death to see me shoutin', but God has been so good to my family through loss. If I had an aisle to run right now, I would be dangerous. . .

About a year ago today, I lost some of my best friends and that was a sad loss for me & my family. Today as I revisited some of the reasons for this loss, I came out with the understanding that sometimes you have to lose those things you held most dearly in order to grab a hold of what is most important. Wow, even in saying that, I am amazed at where God has moved my life. God is so amazing and His plan is so definite that if we just let go and lose all the things around us that seem so important and hold onto Him, He won't let us fall. In fact, it is more than likely His idea for you to let go of those things in the first place.

See, today I trust God more, because I know He leads me. Today, I hold my husband more tightly because I know how the enemy tried to destroy our family. Today, I am aglow with pride because my kids are sensitive to God and I can see His purpose being fulfilled in their lives. Today, I am thankful that my Pastor seeks God's face and brings the Word with passion and intensity because God led us to a wonderful church home.

If I had never let go and experienced the loss and pain I would most likely not be experiencing the greatness that is in my life right now. The Bible teaches us about counting it joy when we are put to the test. I love how 'The Message' depicts James 1:2-4 ~ Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don't try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way.

As the trials and pressures of this life swell around us, let's count it all joy. It is because of the joy I have in my life that I am not as discouraged as I could be about my weight loss (or lack thereof). It is through this joy that I see God growing our business in His time and not ours. It is through this joy that I hopefully can speak peace into the troubled life of a friend or has experienced a loss of their own. It is through this joy that I choose to move forward and take the losses and turn them into wins. God is developing something in you right now and you don't even realize it. Just hang in there through this loss in your life and give Him time to show you what it was about.

Blessings,

Shelly

Rough Patches are for Sanding

I've been going through a 'rough patch' in my home. By definition a rough patch is to experience a lot of problems in a period in your life. I would say that pretty much is dead on for me right now. Maybe 'rough patch' is too harsh really, maybe its just a period of adjustment that has me thinking this through so much.

I think that in this time of crossroads where Brad & I are working together now, building our business, getting ready to move to Nashville, getting the kids' their school interviews for fall, being in Nashville, on average, three days a week, trying to balance that and our quality time is really not working. This transitional time has been pretty hard on me because although I am excited about the changes going on, I don't always deal with change well and right now, everything is changing. Everything!

So many changes, so many concerns, so much to budget, to juggle, to decide, to discuss, to manage, to figure out, and taking no time to enjoy glancing over the top of our plates at a dinner table or a quick hug as we go out the door. People have always picked on Brad & I for our lovey dovey ways and honestly, I have always had a great sense of pride in the fact that we are best friends and that we do always have that spark with each other. Over the last little bit, the spark has gave way to comfort and being so used to seeing each other 24/7 that we haven't had time to miss each other or be excited to see the other person arrive. We wake up together, work together, eat together, cook together, look at houses together, etc. You get the idea.

It made me sad last week as I thought about it and I told Brad, "This is no fun, I feel like, for the first time in six years, we are old married people". This is not who we are, we have let ourselves become this way the last 5 months because we are stressed, over worked and tired and this has made us lazy about one of the most important aspects of our lives, each other.

Today, the scripture, Phillipians 4:6 came to my mind about our situation "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God." Our marriages are, besides our relationship with God, the most important relationships on this earth. With our marriages we show the world around us what an example of a christian marriage is, we teach our children how to be parents and team mates, we show each other the value that we truly have. I have renewed sense of awareness that my marriage will not fall by the wayside of bills and decisions and problems that just won't matter in two weeks. I will cherish how lucky and blessed I am to be married to my best friend and instead of complaining about our life being to boring, find ways to make it not.

Rough Patches are good, because they help us realize that something needs our attention before it's too late. Rough Patches are God's way of saying, Hey, Look over there and sand that down and get back on a smooth path. I am so thankful that He allows me to learn lessons through everything I go through and that He cares for our souls so much!

Blessings,

Shelly

A lesson from the Water

I did some research this morning on freezing and thawing ~ it is so strange to me that we as people completely buck the process that God designed.

I remember being a newlywed and our freezer did not have self defrost, much less an ice maker. Stacking those ice trays ups and checking them way too often would be so frustrating to that 17 year old girl. What was even more frustrating is opening the freezer and there being ice trays in there with no ice and no water at all. Refilling ice trays was not my strong suite. I wish I had known about $5 bags of ice from sonic back then. Anyway, my research today showed me that four typical ice trays put into the freezer at room temperature take 10 hours to freeze. As the molecules of the water get colder and colder they expand and grow larger until they are those chunks of ice.

That typical piece of ice, though, takes on average less than 2 hours to thaw. I don’t know the science on this, but in view of life events I find it interesting. God in all His wisdom made water to thaw faster than he made it to freeze. Can we humans take a lesson from the water? It seems that God has used water for ever to try and teach us lessons.

Genesis 7:17-19 ..and it continued forty days upon the earth; and the waters increased, and bore up the ark, and it rose high above the earth. The waters prevailed and increased greatly upon the earth; and the ark floated on the face of the waters. And the waters prevailed so mightily upon the earth that all the high mountains under the whole heaven were covered."

Exodus 2:5-6 "Now the daughter of Pharaoh came down to bathe at the river, and her maidens walked beside the river; she saw the basket among the reeds and sent her maid to fetch it. When she opened it she saw the child; and lo, the babe was crying. She took pity on him and said, "This is one of the Hebrews' children...And the child grew, and she brought him to Pharaoh's daughter, and he became her son; and she named him Moses, for she said, "Because I drew him out of the water."

Exodus 7:19 The LORD said to Moses, "Tell Aaron, 'Take your staff and stretch out your hand over the waters of Egypt--over the streams and canals, over the ponds and all the reservoirs'--and they will turn to blood. Blood will be everywhere in Egypt, even in the wooden buckets and stone jars."

Exodus 14:21 states, "And Moses stretched out his hand over the sea; and the LORD caused the sea to go back by a strong east wind all that night, and made the sea dry land, and the waters were divided." Verse 24 says, "And it came to pass, that in the morning watch the LORD looked unto the host of the Egyptians through the pillar of fire and of the cloud, and troubled the host of the Egyptians."

Exodus 17:4-5 4 Then Moses cried out to the LORD, "What am I to do with these people? They are almost ready to stone me." 5 The LORD answered Moses, "Walk on ahead of the people. Take with you some of the elders of Israel and take in your hand the staff with which you struck the Nile, and go. 6 I will stand there before you by the rock at Horeb. Strike the rock, and water will come out of it for the people to drink." So Moses did this in the sight of the elders of Israel. 7 And he called the place Massah and Meribah because the Israelites quarreled and because they tested the LORD saying, "Is the LORD among us or not?

Matthew 14:22-33 Jesus walks on the water

John 2:1-5 1 Now on the third day there was a wedding at Cana in Galilee.89 Jesus’ mother was there,90 2 and both Jesus and his disciples were also invited to the wedding. 3 When the wine ran out, Jesus’ mother said to him, “They have no wine left.” 4 Jesus replied, “Woman, why are you saying this to me? My time has not yet come.” 5 His mother told the servants, “Whatever he tells you, do it.

John 4:14 "but whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him will never thirst; the water that I shall give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to Eternal Life."

What has been amazing to me is that when God controls the water there is a lesson in it. When we experience hurts we freeze automatically, we don’t take 10 hours to puff up and let our hearts get hard. It is as instantaneous as the water was turned to wine. We have an automatic icemakers in our minds and hearts and when we experience hurt it is much like that magic shell chocolate we used to use a kids. It hardens around us immediately and is unyielding.

But our thawing process is slow and tenuous. It takes prayer and understanding and hugs and friends to let those guards down. God forbid we get hurt while we are thawing because then our hearts and minds become the human version of the frozen tundra. Layers upon layers of frozen fears and hurts and scabs just pile onto the old ones until we wonder where the first frozen layer even is. Our only hope is to let the God of heaven thaw us from the inside out, to let the miracle of him control our ‘water’ like He has done so aptly since the beginning of time.
As I watched in awe and somewhat horror (just being honest) as my husband smiled and shook someone’s hand yesterday that had brought much pain to our family, I was witnessing a thaw. A thaw of hope and a thaw of mercy that created a thaw of it’s own in my heart. I had never been more proud to say my husband was a person of character and someone I can call my rock and my strength. I pray that God continues to thaw us into what He wants us to be and if you have ice around your heart and your mind, just take it to Him and ask him to THAW you out; that is my prayer today. Let’s be like the ice and be easier to thaw than to be frozen. Let’s be who God desires us to be.

The Lion is Weeping

There is a story about some friends who shared a bond that not many others had shared with them. I am thinking of these friends today. These friends were 'forever friends' ~ friends who at one time meant the world to each other. Whether they were talking about ants in their eyes, or eating dinner from a grill where the cook singed his eyebrows, these friends knew how to laugh and supposedly, how to love. These friends used to belong to me and today, I miss them, today I am sad, today, the Lion is Weeping.

When I let myself get sad for friendships lost I have to remember that Jesus, the ultimate Lion of Judah was betrayed and hurt and killed for the love He had for others. He made the ultimate love sacrifice and the Lion wept. Ultimately the Lion conquered sin and was raised from the dead to give us life eternally and when I think of this sacrifice, it makes my sacrifices and hurts and trials seem so trivial. How do I still miss the friends who betrayed me? Jesus, the true Lion of Judah is in my heart and He guides me through this sadness and brings me to the hope of the resurrection and lets me know that my suffering and shame are going to be trivial as I conquer the sin in my life and draw closer to Him.

It has been almost a year, a crazy, unpredictable, year since these hurts started and tomorrow as we celebrate the resurrection of Jesus I am determined in my heart that this Lion will weep no more, I will forget those things which are behind me and run the race that God has set before me.

Blessings,

Shelly